due to popular demand....

 im back! haha. lets see if i can keep xanga alive. no one probably reads mine anyways. sigh.

well i just pulled my official all nighter. thanks to my friend caffeine.studying for this stupid midterm. art history. argh. and my bet is that i wont do so well since im on my xanga instead of studying more. im sick of studying. my final is at 11 so im just killing time.  whats sad is i knew i was gonna fail before i even started studying. and now that ive studied, im still gonna fail. pretty depressing.  and theres an essay to it. but i think i'll spare myself the embarrassment.crap. im sad now

ok. i lied. maybe that wasnt my last entry.

           so...who's ready to go home? me? i think so. lets just skip all the finals and go home?  i like that idea.
its kinda sad how its not gonna happen though.

this will be my final entry for xanga

AHHHHHHHH!!! effing college. it starts. im leaving in almost ONE day. i said goodbye to all the homies already. im sad. after the last couple of kids left and i had to go pick up mom i was really depressed. REALLY SAD.  but i did NOT cry. i am not a pansy.  everybody better effing write to me. this whole saying goobye stuff isnt fun. and im not even halfway done with saying my goodbyes.  gosh. i know college is suppose to be great and all...but im not feeling it. im having kinda like mixed feelings about it... yea. i get to leave stockton. (YES!)..but then i  have to leave the things in stockton.       =[ yah mean?          bye stockton                  

and the countdown begins.

towards my bday? or moving day?
both.

excited to be 18?
no

more nervous to be 18 or go to college?
college

 anxiety?
a lot.

barf?
the feelings there

 scared?
horrified.

prepared?
not even close

i guess everyone feels the same way right? i was reading my roomates xanga (bc i googled her) and she wrote that she couldnt wait. and jsut hopes for a cool roomate.... well. i think i can say that she doesnt have to worry. but i have like so much more crap here that i still needa finish. but, as i am, its not the first thing on my priority list.

                              until next time......

ok. i have come to realize that they is nothing to be scared of...sorta. im not really stressed about graduation and about senior projects anymore. i think im alright. as for moving..iono. everyone keeps asking me where i want to go to college and what i want to do and where im going to live. i hate that question. because i either dont know or i give a different answer each time. senior year has been so difficult. academically and physically and mentally and socially. it sure did pass. but im betting this month will be one of the longest months of the year. this month so far: shit. and its like the 3rd. bad start. ah well.